What’s the best way to resolve conflict at work? You may not like the answer but research has shown that what’s most effective is to: STOP THE BLAME GAME.
The Problem with Blame. Blame blocks effective conflict resolution and slows down the process of problem solving yet most of us fall into this trap. Have you ever sat in on a brainstorming process that deteriorated into “blamestorming”? If so, you know what I mean.
What Works? In my work resolving conflicts among executive officers, teams and teaching conflict management skills, I’ve found that solutions emerge more easily if I can convince everyone to take responsibility for creating 50% of the problem. You can then indulge in blaming the other party for 50% but if you assume that you can control at least 50%, you are led to action instead of reaction.
What the Research Shows. Researchers at Stanford and the University of Michigan, studying the annual reports of various publicly-held companies from 1975 to 1995, found that self-blame came with a bonus: Firms that attributed their problems to their own actions rather than to external factors ultimately performed better
December 10, 2018
give up our need to be right. That may not be easy at first but with practice, it will become second nature. We have to rise to the level where we admit that no one may be right and that we just need to get on with trying to fix what’s wrong together. Ask yourself: “Would I rather be right or happy?”
