Even on a good day, you can name at least one difficult person at the office. On a bad day you can probably rattle off four or five without even pausing. Be they slackers, sneaks, liars, tyrants, boors, bullies, wimps, whiners, workaholics, or everyday incompetents, you’ve got your hands full with people who are making it difficult to do your job well and stay sane.
While I’ve written about this numerous times both on the Monday Memo and in my book: Stop Pissing Me Off! What to do When the People You Work With Drive You Crazy, there is one skill that stands out from all the other advice: manage differently. Give up on changing them and change YOU.
A Case Study: One of my former executive coaching clients, Bob, came to me about John, one of the junior partners in their high tech consulting firm. None of Bob’s attempts to manage John’s idiosyncrasies over the last five years had worked. A software developer, no one could match John’s relentless and creative pursuit of the most elegant computer designs, but placing him in front of a new client or other employees led to frequent disaster, John eschewed socks and shirts with collars. He worked all night or not at all, turned up the speakers on his computer to play heavy metal music, and mumbled through presentations. Although frequently late with deadlines, his work was superlative. My frustrated client confessed that John was probably one of the top two or three designers in the world.
The Change That Worked: I coached Bob to change his own management style and give up on changing John. He stopped expecting him to meet with clients, gave up on the firm’s strict dress code and softened his approach to work hours. They moved John’s office to an area where his music wouldn’t annoy anyone.
November 12, 2018
