Helping a Group See the Relationship Between Change and Conflict to Move Forward

We were brought in to help a larger HR department manage a simmering dispute between old and new members. The old managers saw themselves as serving the more traditional role of employee advocates. The old VP, Joe, came from an employer relations background and emphasized representing employee needs. The newer members of the department aligned with Ron, a new high-powered executive vice president of HR, and saw themselves as strategic business partners who needed to serve the highest-ranking manager of whatever business unit they were assigned to.

After much discussion, we came up with a creative definition of their role that embraced both ideas. The reason it took them so long and required a facilitator was not so much the substantive conflict itself as it was the whole issue of change. The old managers were literally struggling with the grieving process as they moved into a new and uncertain future. The new VP and the new managers were also struggling with the change process. Even though the move to new jobs was something they had all sought, they had to learn that even positive changes take us through the predictable stages of loss and grief. If we don’t acknowledge and move through each stage, we will flounder. Frequently, because we’re not conscious of why we feel upset, we will project our anxiety outside ourselves onto our co-workers. Conflicts naturally follow.

Once the group had an opportunity to talk honestly about the changes they were all experiencing and were able to express the common feelings they shared, the underlying issues were much easier to creatively explore and solve.